Somewhere at the harbor, an illegal dumping takes place. "What do you think's in these
barrels we're paid to unload every night, McGee?" "May the dear Lord continue to blanket us
in ignorance & impunity, O'Malley." Toxi-corp. Beauty Bay.
Elsewhere, in the Third World, a heist is underway. "Quick Lewis, load that stolen well water
onto the truck." "What about the poor people we're stealing it from, Jims?" "Don't worry. Our
corporate overlords will sell it back to them at a reasonable price."
Mystical Springs Bottled Water Co. Later, at a manufacturing plant, a labor meeting is held.
"Good news boys: the company's profits are up, the stocks are through the roof, and progress &
expansion march forward." "What's the bad news?" "We're all fired."
"Good news boys: the company's profits are up, the stocks are through the roof, and progress &
expansion march forward." "What's the bad news?" "We're all fired."
U.S. Enterprises "Making goods for US" Deep in the sanctum of the Rich Cave, Richman
studies the screens of the Crime Computer. "A new kind of crime is pillaging the pocketbooks
of humankind, Billfold. Corporate crime."
"And this corporate crime operates on a system of green unlike anything I have ever seen."
RICH CAVE TOWER
"When I donned this top hat and monocle, I did so to seek truth, justice, and money. As a
humble man of immeasurable wealth, I will not stand by and watch a beautiful empire, built
by finance, trampled upon by such careless boots."
"TIME TO WRITE SOME WRONGS!" CLICK CLICK. Scribble. Lick lick. RING RING.
BUTLER CALL. "You rang, sir?"
"Buttworth, I need you to mail these letters and ready the Rich-Cottage. I've got a plan
to save (the day)." "Yes, your Richness." $ $
Later, Richman's letters begin to arrive at the CEO'S offices around the world.
TOXI-CORP. H.Q. "Excuse me sir, a letter for you." Thank you Merridew, fire yourself
on the way out." Mystical Springs Bottled Water Co. U.S. ENTERPRISES
TOXI-CORP. H.Q. "Excuse me sir, a letter for you." Thank you Merridew, fire yourself
on the way out." Mystical Springs Bottled Water Co. U.S. ENTERPRISES
"I wonder who this could be from?" RIIP. OPEN. READ.
Dear CEO, Please meet me at my Rich-Cottage on Tuesday. All your money problems
will be solved. Sincerely, -Richman
Later on Tuesday, the CEO's arrive at the Rich-Cottage. "Excuse me my dear chap, where
do I park?" CEO PRIVATE AIR. Parking Attendant.
Inside the Rich-Cottage... "Gentlemen and lady, thank you all for coming. I've gathered you
here today to solve all your corporate problems. As you know, corporations only only care
about money. But what if they didn't? What if there was a new bottom line;
some irresistible incentive for all of you to do good?" "After years of cutting edge research,
about money. But what if they didn't? What if there was a new bottom line;
science-trials, and careful construction, I believe I have finally created that incentive.
I call it..."
Vrrrr. Chick Chick Chick. DROP DROP
"AHHHH" "HEEELP!" "NEEOOOH" "BLOODTHIRSTY SHARKS." Drop Drop Drop
RAARH! SNAP! SNAP!
"As you can see I've been feeding these sharks a steady diet of bills for months. Their taste
for riches is insatiable."'AHHH" OOH NOOO!" "AAHHHHHHHH" Dump Dump
SNAP SNAP GRRRR
"A few nibbles here and there should provide ample motivation for you all to do some
good for humanity." NIP NIP NIP NIP
"RICHMAN- NO! There must be another way!" "MERCY RICHMAN! What's good for
humanity just ins't profitable!" "And if our companies don't make more profit than the day before,
our shareholders will leave, and our businesses will collapse,
therefore unemploying the world, and destroying the economy!" "You see Richman, we
have to make money, or else civilization is doomed." "Hmm, there might be another way.
But it wont be easy."
"How about: for every good deed you do, every drinking well you don't poison, every tree
you plant, every baby seal you don't club, your company shall receive a hefty shipment of shiny
gold. By sparing your lives, this regulation of "gold-for-good" will go into full effect."
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "ANYTHING BUT REGULATION!" "DROP US IN THE
SHARKS PLEASE!" "Kill mee." SNAP SNAP
"NOT SO FAST EAGER-TO-DIE CEOS! Regulation hasn't worked in the past because
it was run by civil servants, independent watch-dog groups, and do-gooders. We all know there
is only one thing that can truly regulate a corporation with success."
"Which is why today I propose that all corporations from here-on be regulated by the VISAP
corporation. VISAP corporation.
"Just look at these expensive graphs. It makes sense that the corporation who is the most
successful be in charge of all the corporations. And all VISAP asks for your guaranteed returns,
is a mere 65% ownership of all your shares. LAST YEAR'S PROFITS:
is a mere 65% ownership of all your shares. LAST YEAR'S PROFITS:
Economic Growth. Not Visap. Visap. Year: 1900s- Today.
VISAP. All other corporations. Rest of earth. VISAP CONTRACT, sign here.
VISAP. All other corporations. Rest of earth. VISAP CONTRACT, sign here.
SIGN VISAP. SIGN VISAP. SIGN VISAP.
"And in a baffling move today, corporations everywhere gave 65% of their shareholdings to
VISAP: a conglomerate (owned by famed tycoon Pubis Richly), which creates bright futures
using finance, credit, technology, and progress. In other news, the mysterious Rich Man was
seen coaxing a cat out of a tree by throwing small change at it. Just who is this rich and benevolent
superhero?" PUBIS RICHLY, CEO OF VISAP. RICHMAN, MYSTERIOUS HERO. AON
ALWAYS ON NEWS 24/7 And so the corporate day was saved.
And so the the corporate day was saved. "That's right, give everyone a raise, and put more R&D
into pouring healthier toxic waste into the ocean. Doesn't matter if we're running at a loss- VISAP
just got here!" "Special delivery, sir." "Take a few gold bars home to the Misses delivery boy."
"Gee thanks Mister! I'm not in a relationship, but now I can afford to be!" Toxi-Corp And so
the day-saving spread everywhere. VISAP Foods. BUY VISAP! Hotel VISAP. Visap Bay.
VISAP Boat Co.
Everywhere. Visap. EVERYWHERE, BROUGH TO YOU BY VISAP. THE END.
